I don't care what your gender is, or how you identify yourself. However, if you make it difficult for me to pick, I'm just going to call you FirstName LastName. A HeSheIt I work with has changed their identity 3 times since I've known them. I literally don't care as long as they get their work done and they do good work. I told them that I have a difficult time enough putting faces to names and I literally don't care as I believe as long as nobody makes anybody else's life more miserable. I literally don't care and we're stuck on this rock together to fret over such things for our short period alive.
They were a bit upset because "it is important to them" and I said "I'm fine with it being important to you, but unless I am adversely impacting your well-being does it really matter to anyone else? Do you feel that it is fair for you to force your will of it being important to you on others?" I think they got what I was saying, and since then I noticed they'd been less hostile towards others who didn't care.
In the olden days you could make an identity for yourself using sports teams or where you went to college or or or or. Shit, even the car you drive. But now it's more about the threads you can afford to buy and the shitty meals you bought on the beach for the 'gram.
I think we are at a point where so many people believe they are truly special when in reality they're just another snowflake adrift in the storm. It's really difficult to grow up thinking you're special and to find out that literally no one cares. I know it sounds really "boomer" to blame it on cellphones, but I think people's lack of personal connection whatsoever--something as simple as eye contact--has made people feel like they aren't special to anyone. And to be honest, they're probably not, and I think most people know that by the time they become a cog on society going to work to do whatever just to keep living... but today people aren't ready for that.
I'm an Old Millennial. A bunch of my friends my age are really struggling right now. They got to a good place in life through hard work and determination but they're struggling with "there has to be more to life than this". I think I'm past that am into "Well, if I'm lucky I'll not get bored before I die and my lifetime of collecting cool shit will not go through probate".
Our goddamn cat is missing. I'm an introvert. I will avoid social interaction at all costs. My wife is an introvert masquerading as an extrovert. Something as simple as going door to door handing out fliers to find our goddamn cat... I got her to come out of the car maybe 2 times total? I'll go knock on doors and stop people in the road to talk to them. I'm on a mission. A few people I tried hard to make a connection with and I got a couple callbacks out of it because they asked their friends if they saw our cat. I start with "Hi, I'm looking for our cat, I was wondering if you've seen him... he looks like every other cat you've ever seen but he's special to us here's a flier with pictures... we live at the crappy house down the road by blah blah blah... you sure do have a nice house here and it's super quiet..." My experience is most people won't do that effort, but they'll tear down someone for having ugly toes on dreddit. I met some weird as fuck people in the last two weeks, clearly struggling in life, like hill people weird, like the kind if the world ends they'll show up at my house and I'll have a pile of shoes like Book of Eli.
It's really rough to go your whole life trying to build an identity for yourself, afraid of what the world is because it makes less sense than it used to...
and to find out you're just another fucking sheep in the herd.