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Old April 4th, 2007, 12:59 PM   #1
mikesova
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Default What do you think about the advice given here, Kerwin?

This is a similar situation to mine currently, just wondering what your thoughts were on this:

http://christianblogs.christianet.com/1128531395.htm

Can A Christian Marry An Agnostic

I am 25 and have been dating the most wonderful guy for the last 3 years. I am a christian and he is agnostic. He treats me so wonderful and there is not a bad bone in his body, he respects my faith. He wants us to get engaged, can I marry an unbeliever and continue to lead him toward salvation?

Moderator - The Word of God says no. In addition the Word of God states a Christian shouldn't be dating a nonbeliever in the first place. Please read II Corinthians 6:14-15.

Personally i think it's rediculous.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 01:13 PM   #2
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my wife is baptist. i'm agnostic. my mom didnt want to come to the wedding unless the wife converted to catholicism, but she didnt, and mother came to the wedding anyway.

its my marriage, observed in a country where its freedoms grant such a marriage, and there's isnt anything to defend.

sorry, i didnt click your link yet... so i'm not sure i'm contributing correctly to this discussion...
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Old April 4th, 2007, 01:55 PM   #3
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I am a Christian as most of you know G-man is a none beliver. We have had 29 years of marrage and raised 3 children. two of them are christian the oldest son is a non beliver. And it is working out just fine for us.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:01 PM   #4
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Kerwin's opinion doesn't matter, nor does anyone else's. The way it should be is what the bible says and it's pretty clear there in II Corinthians 6:14-15. Think what you want, and live your life how you want, but if you're a Christian following God's word, you should be following that commandment just as any other. No offense to Miffy, Gman, or TonyBalido, if the way you're doing things works for you, that's great, but it isn't the way it should be according to the bible. Christianity is something that should be shared between a couple and you should grow together in Christ.

Christians can't just pick and choose what they think is ridiculous or not in the bible. It says what it says and it's generally pretty cut and dry.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:09 PM   #5
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Why when non-believers take the bible word for word and call someone out on it is it all of a sudden open to interpretation; however when it comes to something like this you say the bible is cut and dry?
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:16 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by artistic_gore View Post
Why when non-believers take the bible word for word and call someone out on it is it all of a sudden open to interpretation; however when it comes to something like this you say the bible is cut and dry?
This is the first post I've ever made on this site involving religion, so surely you're not referring to me directly. I think the bible is pretty cut and dry most of the time, but sometimes it's worded oddly and it needs to be interpreted. That where different denominations come from, is where the complexly worded things are interpreted differently.

I really don't care if people have relationships between Christians and non-believers, I was just commenting on the original topic. I have friends that are in the exact situation, I was just reiterating what the bible has to say about it. How much more than those verses be interpreted?
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:21 PM   #7
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I think it's a bad idea, I realize it can work, but I chose to marry someone with the same beliefs I do. I wan't gonna marry a woman who may want to teach our kids differently, or treat marriage differently, or be working out of a moral standard on a different page than my own. To me, faith is a foundation to a person's life, and if we are on different foundations, that is a big problem. I would advise that woman to talk to her man more about why he rejects Christ, and to deny his proposal if he never believes.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:24 PM   #8
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That was a general statement. I find that when people like myself (atheists) read and cite the bible christians argue (whatever point we're trying to make at the time) by saying it is open to interpretation and you have to realize that the book was written thousands of years ago and may not necessarily apply to modern society in whole. However when they choose to make a point about something we are doing wrong such as marrying into the flock, all of a sudden the bible is infalible and means exactly as it says.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:40 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by tonybalido View Post
my wife is baptist. i'm agnostic. my mom didnt want to come to the wedding unless the wife converted to catholicism, but she didnt, and mother came to the wedding anyway.

its my marriage, observed in a country where its freedoms grant such a marriage, and there's isnt anything to defend.

sorry, i didnt click your link yet... so i'm not sure i'm contributing correctly to this discussion...

With all due respect to you and yours........ and I'm not saying that you are wrong or right..... just trying to state a fact.

That is the problem with religions and "freedom" In this wonderful country, the 1st amendment of the Constitution states that we have the right to chose which religion to practice and how to pratice our beliefs.

On the flip side, each religion has its belief system and its own rules or "laws." I know that in my religion, Marrage is a holy sacrament and is taken very serious. If I were to marry someone that is not of the same religion, I could be considered excommunicated by the holy laws. Does it mean that it is inforced? It all depends on the leaders of the church and how "extreme" they are.

A lot of the religious laws are take from the holy scriptures....... How can one argue against those?
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Old April 4th, 2007, 02:44 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by artistic_gore View Post
That was a general statement. I find that when people like myself (atheists) read and cite the bible christians argue (whatever point we're trying to make at the time) by saying it is open to interpretation and you have to realize that the book was written thousands of years ago and may not necessarily apply to modern society in whole. However when they choose to make a point about something we are doing wrong such as marrying into the flock, all of a sudden the bible is infalible and means exactly as it says.
That is a great point!

I have a friend who's father preaches the bible up and down, left to right and around the block. But when he left his 3 boys and wife of 18 years 2 days before Christmas, he seemed to interprite a passage of the bible saying that it was okay for him to cheat, divorse, and abandon his family to start a new one in Texas! That dood is a whack job!
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:15 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by DaveKerwin View Post
I think it's a bad idea, I realize it can work, but I chose to marry someone with the same beliefs I do. I wan't gonna marry a woman who may want to teach our kids differently, or treat marriage differently, or be working out of a moral standard on a different page than my own. To me, faith is a foundation to a person's life, and if we are on different foundations, that is a big problem. I would advise that woman to talk to her man more about why he rejects Christ, and to deny his proposal if he never believes.

I also belive that Faith is a foundation to a person's life, just some people have different beliefs. Who am I to judge theres to mine? Do not put false judgment on the neighbor......

I am sucure in my belief's enough to be around others that do not have the same as I do.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:16 PM   #12
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I also belive that Faith is a foundation to a person's life, just some people have different beliefs. Who am I to judge theres to mine? Do not put false judgment on the neighbor......

I am sucure in my belief's enough to be around others that do not have the same as I do.
Marv isn't your neighbor, he is your bed fellow.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:22 PM   #13
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Marv isn't your neighbor, he is your bed fellow.

he is my friend......first and formost......
then my partner in life
then my bed fellow as you call it.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:39 PM   #14
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I'm just saying he is not a neighbor who lives somewhere else, you share a bed with the man. So his beliefs ARE important, and they DO hold a bearing on decisions regarding marriage. I am glad it worked out for you two, very glad. Marriage is awesome and marriage vows should never be broken, so for that I applaud you. I hope I make the long haul in my marriage. But when you decided to marry him, that was a risk. You did not know for sure at the time that he would give you the batton to run with teaching your kids the faith. What if he decided he would not allow those teachings? That could have been a marriage killer. But gladly it did not go that way.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:46 PM   #15
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I'm just saying he is not a neighbor who lives somewhere else, you share a bed with the man. So his beliefs ARE important, and they DO hold a bearing on decisions regarding marriage. I am glad it worked out for you two, very glad. Marriage is awesome and marriage vows should never be broken, so for that I applaud you. I hope I make the long haul in my marriage. But when you decided to marry him, that was a risk. You did not know for sure at the time that he would give you the batton to run with teaching your kids the faith. What if he decided he would not allow those teachings? That could have been a marriage killer. But gladly it did not go that way.
we covered that befor we did the vow's. and yes we were married in a church. and now I am a sinner in my home church because if it but now I have 7 gifts from god children and grandchildren that I feel god has blessed me with. and have no regrets and do not feel I have fosaken my religion or myself.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:53 PM   #16
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if you divorced him for no good reason, I would say you were not holding to your faith, but that is not the case. I got no issue with you, like I said, I hope to make the long haul!

If someone gets married, they should remain married (thats what the bible says). But generally speaking, I do not think it wise in any way for someone to DATE someone from a foundationally different faith. Thats the thing, if you never date the person, then you would never be caught in a decision crisis of marriage.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:53 PM   #17
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A Christian not agreeing with the bible, I found that funny, then the rest just turned to babble.

Personally If I could bring myself to admit god existed I would be an Antichrist, I was raised reformed and well, need not go into the rest.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:53 PM   #18
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Dave if you are say Baptist and a lady is Jewish does this make her have less of a fondation then you ? Its still based on her bieleves yet i think you would run into more problems then say Miff and I setting morals for our kids and so on .

Let me tell you somthing , ill put my " morals " up against any man of faith . Iv been there and done it . 29 years faithful husband . Dad who never abused his children , all the things you would think a god fearing man would stand for yet i didnt need an excuse to be a nice guy . A good man is born not raised with some particular bieleve .

Marry for love , i dont give a shit what some book says nor what Dr Phil says
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Old April 4th, 2007, 03:59 PM   #19
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Dave if you are say Baptist and a lady is Jewish does this make her have less of a fondation then you ? Its still based on her bieleves yet i think you would run into more problems then say Miff and I setting morals for our kids and so on .

Let me tell you somthing , ill put my " morals " up against any man of faith . Iv been there and done it . 29 years faithful husband . Dad who never abused his children , all the things you would think a god fearing man would stand for yet i didnt need an excuse to be a nice guy . A good man is born not raised with some particular bieleve .

Marry for love , i dont give a shit what some book says nor what Dr Phil says
lay the smackdown.
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Old April 4th, 2007, 04:04 PM   #20
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Dave if you are say Baptist and a lady is Jewish does this make her have less of a fondation then you ? Its still based on her bieleves yet i think you would run into more problems then say Miff and I setting morals for our kids and so on .

Let me tell you somthing , ill put my " morals " up against any man of faith . Iv been there and done it . 29 years faithful husband . Dad who never abused his children , all the things you would think a god fearing man would stand for yet i didnt need an excuse to be a nice guy . A good man is born not raised with some particular bieleve .

Marry for love , i dont give a shit what some book says nor what Dr Phil says
Again, I think if two people stand on different foundations, it only makes things more difficult. Now if you were the stellar guy you are AND miff was the same faith, don't you think things may be even stronger? Maybe the two of you would lead the children together in your mutual beliefs?

I do love my wife dearly, she is a true blessing, but when times get tough for us, I know she will obey God's law. She knows that of me as well. I find that to be a great perk on top of the fact that she is a great woman. No question that two people can have a successful and love-filled marriage outside of their faith, I know it happens. But the way I am desribing it is more in the form of council for a person who is trying to enter into the mate selection process. You start with ideals, and you try to uphold all of them. When I was looking for a bride, I wanted a woman who first loved Jesus, then was of good moral character, then who was good looking, then who was funny, and so on. And I found a God loving beautiful woman who made me laugh my butt off, and who would not be able to sleep at night if she lied. You better believe I put a ring on her finger as fast as I could.
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