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Old December 20th, 2012, 09:14 PM   #21
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My 8 year old, a few years ago...she was always having problems with yeast infections. When she would get out of the shower I would tell her to not get dressed right away so she could air out her "china". She said rolling her eyes and matter of factly, "Dad, it's a vagina, not a "china"!
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Old December 21st, 2012, 01:57 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marshall View Post
My daughter was probably 5 when she woke up Christmas morning and said ' see mom, I told you you don't have to be good to get presents'


I would have told her that they are for someone else.
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Old December 21st, 2012, 02:42 PM   #23
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When my son was 8, my neighbor was on a ladder contemplating on some branches to be cut and "fuck it.. cut it" was shouted out! I looked at him and he took off running.
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Old December 21st, 2012, 04:08 PM   #24
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Driving in the truck, my three year old breaks the silence with "Dad, I fucking love you".
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Old December 21st, 2012, 04:54 PM   #25
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many moons ago our daughter, then about age 10 asked a question at dinner table:

"if we don't want isreal to go to war, why do we keep sellling them weapons?"

silence prevailed
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Old December 21st, 2012, 04:59 PM   #26
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a friends kid "daddy is that a hooker?"
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Old December 21st, 2012, 05:38 PM   #27
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My wife is pregnant now ready to pop any day. Today at dinner with my brother and his family the subject comes up that my wife hopes to lose the 32 lbs she has gained while prego. My 4 yr old niece say " I hope so aunt Angie cuz that's how my got fat" I couldn't help bust out lol.
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Old December 21st, 2012, 05:43 PM   #28
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Girlfriends six year old brother ( I know, decent age gap there)
Me, my girlfriend, her sister, mom, dad and brother were all in the living room watching a football game. Her dad notices that the little guy had his hands down his pants and asked
Dad: "what are you doing with your hands?"
Brother: "moving my 'peepe'...it's annoying"
Dad: "Why is it annoying...?"
Brother: "I don't know it's just too long now"
Said with complete seriousness and innocence. Had the whole room rolling for a few minutes after.
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 02:59 AM   #29
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Me: Are you all done puking?
Son: Yep, BLAUAUAUAUauaaauuuuuauuuuu, nope.
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 05:50 AM   #30
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While having a conversation with my three year old nephew...
Me: Did you enjoy that mango?
Him: yep
Me: would you like some more?
Him: yep
Me: that must be really good...
Him: yep
Me: all done? Ready to wash your hands?
Him: yep
Me: do you ever say anything other than "yep"
.....long pause.... you can see his wheels spinning... HUGE grin...
Him: yep!
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 06:35 AM   #31
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6 year old son looking at WWII pictures with my Dad : "Did they have color in the world back then?"
Me : "You mean color photographs?"
Son : "No I mean was there any color?"
Same son, talking to my wife on the the phone from a friend's house : "What's this curly thing on the phone?" (He had never seen a phone cord)
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 07:46 AM   #32
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Me to my 5 year old nephew who was in a hurry: Keep your shirt on.
My nephew looks at me and says: My shirt is on.
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 08:20 AM   #33
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Quite a few years ago we were sitting in dennys with my oldest daughter. She was 2 and a little black girl sat next to us at the bar and she yells "daddy get this girl away from me she's all dirty"
We left abruptly and I had to explain it to her.

Last year my youngest who was four was riding in my grandmothers truck. We were behind a slow moving vehicle and she yells from the back seat "for fucks sake get the hell outta the way"
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Old December 22nd, 2012, 08:52 AM   #34
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When I was little I looooooved trucks and would always point to them and get excited. I'm told my parents had to do a lot of explaining because when I was really young my "tr" always came out as an "f"
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Old December 23rd, 2012, 08:09 AM   #35
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Me: You don't touch your penis unless your peeing.

3 Year Old Son: Oh, I'm gonna go pee then.
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Old December 23rd, 2012, 11:55 PM   #36
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my cousin when she was probably around 4, farted really loudly while at the beach. She promptly reached behind her, covered her butt and said, "Oop, I burped."
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Old December 24th, 2012, 08:34 AM   #37
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Wen my stepdaughter was about eight, she proclaimed that "she'd rather be lost than be a statue".

I have NO idea what she was thinking.
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Old December 25th, 2012, 06:41 PM   #38
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Asked my almost 3 year old grandchild "what does your mom want for Christmas?" Her response: tomatoes.
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Old December 25th, 2012, 07:17 PM   #39
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Last Christmas my girlfriends 10 year old daughter was opening presents and Grandma had gotten her some perfume. She says this is awesome I need some perfume because Mom said I am going to start my period soon! I blew coffee out my nose.
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Old December 25th, 2012, 09:44 PM   #40
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Took my son shopping the other day to buy Christmas gifts for his sisters, & his mom. (He's 6)
He couldn't decide on a gift for one of his sister's, so I suggested some stuff that smelled good. (Lotion's and such)
We were on our way to Bath & Body Works, and as we walked by Victoria Secrets he promptly turned and went strolling right in to the store.
I asked. " Hey where ya going buddy?" He responded with, "It smells pretty good in here daddy!"
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