|November 7th, 2012, 08:15 AM||#1|
Yooper In Training
Join Date: 03-29-06
Location: Fowlertucky, MI
Mentioned: 19 Post(s)
BBA's thought's on politics
Since everybody has become a political expert the past few months, here’s my not-so-professional analogy of the current situation. It's not intended to start yet another debate, just to provide some light hearted entertainment from either side of the fence. Like it or not you should get a few laughs out of it:
Dubya enjoyed his time in the White House and decided to leave his successor a little surprise. So he took a dump in the presidential toilet without so much as a courtesy flush. Obama moves in, gets excited, and goes and drops a loaf of his own on top. He finishes up, flushes, and it doesn’t go down. He starts frantically looking for a plunger but finds nothing. The bowl is pretty full but the water at least stopped rising.
Just then, Biden wanders in, “Dude, Barry, we made it! This is gonna be aweso…….oh my God. WHAT’D YOU DO?????”
“STFU Joe, Bush did it”
“I dunno man, some of that looks pretty fresh.”
“Okay fine, some of it is mine, but G-Dub clogged this shit up.”
“Fuck you Joe.”
“You’re such a dick sometimes. Look at me, I’m the first black president…..get over yourself, you’re half white.”
Obama looked pissed but let it go. “You know they’re gonna blame all of this on me, right? We need to do something.”
They stared for a few minutes and didn’t have any great ideas. Suddenly Joe asked, “Well have you tried flushing it again?” as he reached for the handle.
“No wait!!!” Obama shouted, but he was too late and the flushing had begun.
As the clog stayed put the water level began to rise closer and closer to the edge of the bowl. As the brown water began flowing over the rim and onto the floor Biden looked at Obama, shrugged, and said, “Well that’s all I’ve got. Good luck man” and walked out. Obama muttered a few creative cuss words and continued to stare at the rising water on the floor. He grabbed a few throw rugs to try and cover it up but eventually they got waterlogged and sank to the stinky bottom.
Suddenly China wandered in, smelled the air, and looked at the situation. “Uh oh, rooks rike you’ve got a probrem!!”
“Rooks rike rots of shit.”
“Ugh. So are you gonna help or are you just gonna stand there?”
“I thin I can help. I have prunga, but it going to cost you. You want?”
China ran out to go find the plunger and Obama continued to stare, frustration growing by the second. Just when he thought it couldn’t get any worse, in wanders the UN.
“Hey man, welcome to the party! What’s that smell?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Oh damn, did you do that???”
“No, Bush left it for me.”
“Yeah I bet. You should really consider changing your diet. This smells terrible and is really making it uncomfortable for the rest of us. You should try some of the vegan dishes we’ve been getting lately.”
“Yeah I’ll think about it, that doesn’t sound have bad. Can you give me a few minutes to get this taken care of?”
“Yeah whatever. Good luck, I’m out.”
Just then China bursts back in with a cheap looking plunger. “Look I help, I’m impotent.”
“You mean important?”
“That what I said, impotent.”
“Gimme that.” Obama starts hammering away at the clog. Just as it starts to move the plunger breaks in half. “Goddamnit!! Where was this POS made??”
“It cool, we know. You still owe me though. I’m outta here. Good luck roundeye!!”
He tries flushing more, jiggling the handle, kicking it, you name it…..but without a plunger the clog stays, the water level keeps getting higher, and the room keeps getting stinkier. Meanwhile, Romney is outside the gate jumping up and down and waving around a tooth brush, yelling, “Look guys I can help, I have just the tool for the job!! Let me in!!!”
|November 7th, 2012, 08:52 AM||#5|
Join Date: 03-28-08
Location: Holland Mi
Mentioned: 33 Post(s)
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