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Old September 16th, 2010, 08:27 AM   #1
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Default Man Caught Masturbating To Swimsuit Issue In Walmart

Man Caught Masturbating To SI Swimsuit Issue In Walmart, Wipes Hand Off On Toys


Good Lord. William Tyler Black, a 28-year-old substitute teacher from Florida, was arrested by Sarasota police after walking into a Walmart, picking up a Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue from the magazine section, and proceeding to masturbate in the store’s toy aisle “to completion.”

It gets grosser. Black “ejaculated onto the floor and wiped his hand on a toy along with rubbing his foot in the suspected semen on the floor,” according to a store employee. The toy was a lightsaber, in case you were wondering.

Black then threw the magazine behind a shelf and walked to the front of the store like he didn’t just masturbate openly in the toy section. When police asked him what the hell he was doing, he told them he was there, “shopping for a toy for his daughter.”

Black was charged with battery on a child, since a “reasonable person would believe that a child would come in contact with the fluid on the toy being that it was left in the toy aisle of the store.”
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Old September 16th, 2010, 08:29 AM   #2
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Sick fucker!
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Old September 16th, 2010, 08:32 AM   #3
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wtf is the matter with people. put this guy down.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 08:33 AM   #4
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wtf is the matter with people. put this guy down.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 08:58 AM   #5
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Wow is all I can say.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 09:07 AM   #6
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Someone needs to hit his paynus with the claw end of a hammer.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 09:16 AM   #7
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http://www.heraldtribune.com/article...9867/2058/NEWS
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Old September 16th, 2010, 09:27 AM   #8
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Someone needs to hit his paynus with the claw end of a hammer.
The sick fucker might actually get off on that..
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Old September 16th, 2010, 09:32 AM   #9
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Sorry, it wont happen again
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Old September 16th, 2010, 09:57 AM   #10
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I liked the story about the naked chick in the cab better.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 11:23 AM   #11
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Someone needs to hit his paynus with the claw end of a hammer.
Oooooooooo, ouch!!!!!

Last edited by ppkaprince98; September 16th, 2010 at 02:14 PM.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 02:27 PM   #12
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Sarasota? Isn't that where PeeWee Herman got caught in a movie theatre flogging the bishop?
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Old September 16th, 2010, 02:46 PM   #13
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Sarasota? Isn't that where PeeWee Herman got caught in a movie theatre flogging the bishop?
yes, at an adult theatre.


Shit my truck came from from Sarasota area
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Old September 16th, 2010, 02:46 PM   #14
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Sarasota? Isn't that where PeeWee Herman got caught in a movie theatre flogging the bishop?
yup

On July 26, 1991, Reubens was arrested in Sarasota, Florida, for allegedly masturbating during a screening of "Nancy Nurse" in an adult movie theater
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Old September 16th, 2010, 02:49 PM   #15
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yes, at an adult theatre.


Shit my truck came from from Sarasota area
That smell in your truck is not from detailing chemicals.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 10:50 PM   #16
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yes, at an adult theatre.


Shit my truck came from from Sarasota area

you probably dont want to shine a black light in there
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Old September 16th, 2010, 10:55 PM   #17
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People jerk off in department stores all the time.
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Old September 16th, 2010, 10:57 PM   #18
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That's retarded
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Old September 17th, 2010, 09:34 AM   #19
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People jerk off in department stores all the time.
wat? that's f*cked up.
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Old September 17th, 2010, 09:49 AM   #20
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People jerk off in department stores all the time.
Do you at least let them finish before escorting them out
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