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Old April 4th, 2010, 07:40 PM   #1
Kodiak450r
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do you think that 2 people must get married or is it acceptable to continue dating for long periods of time? me and the gf had a major fight the other day and it sparked my curiosity on what other people thought about marriage in general.

my though is that marriage is stupid, outdated, has a 50% failure rate, and is a religious tradition that doesn't fit modern society IMO. i for one am not religious and do not believe in any god, or any higher power or whatever else people believe in these days.

what marriage to me means is a piece of paper that legally declares i'm with someone, and a ring on your finger that tells other people that your taken. you don't need paper and an expensive ring for that...
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Old April 4th, 2010, 07:42 PM   #2
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Old April 4th, 2010, 07:49 PM   #3
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cool story bros before hoes
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Old April 4th, 2010, 07:53 PM   #4
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I think you should be able to merry another man if you want to, Just because I dont want to do it I am not going to stand in your way.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:03 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
do you think that 2 people must get married or is it acceptable to continue dating for long periods of time? me and the gf had a major fight the other day and it sparked my curiosity on what other people thought about marriage in general.

my though is that marriage is stupid, outdated, has a 50% failure rate, and is a religious tradition that doesn't fit modern society IMO. i for one am not religious and do not believe in any god, or any higher power or whatever else people believe in these days.

what marriage to me means is a piece of paper that legally declares i'm with someone, and a ring on your finger that tells other people that your taken. you don't need paper and an expensive ring for that...
Marriage works, IMO. I believe that the "paper" you get should be called something like a Union or something and the Term marriage should be left to the "Religious" folks. The Government should keep it simple. And Even though I don't agree with Gay Marriage it would make those guys happy too. Basically, If they want to get a marriage then be a man and a women. If you want the same Benefits of a "marriage" then get a ______. IMO of course.

That being said, I don't think Gay marriage is right, but I'm also a Christian. It's not a natural thing, it's just a lie and is perverse. Also, if it were genetic then there would technically only be a "Bi" Gene because the Homosexual gene has no way of reproducing. that and there would be no Evolutionary advantage to it. If you believe in Evolution (Not me), The Mutations that are only beneficial to the Creature are kept. Homosexuality seems like it would be a dead end....In that way.

Cliff Notes = One man + One Woman = Marriage.

One man/Woman + One Man/Woman = _____?
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:11 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
what marriage to me means is a piece of paper that legally declares i'm with someone, and a ring on your finger that tells other people that your taken. you don't need paper and an expensive ring for that...
if you love her, and are committed enough to ensure for her future, it's the easiest way to be certain of at least heading in that direction.

aside from your assertions that it's only a religious carryover from a bygone time - it is in fact a legal contract.

certain legal things such as exposure to or protection from liability can be sheltered through such a contract. additionally certain probate issues are automatically resolved, rather than lingering in court.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:11 PM   #7
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i wasn't referring to gay marriage. referring to straight marriage. i just don't see the point in either case, and wanna know if i'm the only one who feels you don't have to be married to be with someone for a long term relationship/have a house and a kid.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:13 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by RyeBread View Post
if you love her, and are committed enough to ensure for her future, it's the easiest way to be certain of at least heading in that direction.

aside from your assertions that it's only a religious carryover from a bygone time - it is in fact a legal contract.

certain legal things such as exposure to or protection from liability can be sheltered through such a contract. additionally certain probate issues are automatically resolved, rather than lingering in court.
then why do marriages have a roughly 50% success rate nowadays?
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:13 PM   #9
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where do you get your 'facts' on this 50% failure rate?
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:16 PM   #10
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then why do marriages have a roughly 50% success rate nowadays?
what in the hell does that false assertion have to do with what I typed?
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:17 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
do you think that 2 people must get married or is it acceptable to continue dating for long periods of time? me and the gf had a major fight the other day and it sparked my curiosity on what other people thought about marriage in general.

my though is that marriage is stupid, outdated, has a 50% failure rate, and is a religious tradition that doesn't fit modern society IMO. i for one am not religious and do not believe in any god, or any higher power or whatever else people believe in these days.

what marriage to me means is a piece of paper that legally declares i'm with someone, and a ring on your finger that tells other people that your taken. you don't need paper and an expensive ring for that...
The way you put it, it sounds like to me you do not have what it takes to stay in a relationship, commitment is what makes a marriage work. You have to take the good with the bad. You make your women everything, you lay down your life for her and let her know it. With your out look on marriage you can now join the 50% and higher group of failed marriages because that is where you will end up.
Nowadays most churches will not marry you and your future wife unless you are committed to at least a 3 month pre marital class to even see if you are ready for marriage. A pastor does not want to marry you and then see your marriage fail in a year.IMO
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:20 PM   #12
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http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/02..._mar_cohab.htm

in part, some text that may be pertinent to you:

Quote:
"We've expanded our analysis beyond the basic 'bookends' of marriage and divorce to look more closely at how the issue of cohabitation impacts the life of a relationship," said Dr. Ed Sondik, Director of CDC's National Center for Health Statistics. "At the same time, we've also attempted to look beyond the influence of individual characteristics and are looking more at the characteristics of the community at large to get a comprehensive picture of what factors impact marriage and divorce rates in this country."

Among the findings in the report: unmarried cohabitations overall are less stable than marriages. The probability of a first marriage ending in separation or divorce within 5 years is 20 percent, but the probability of a premarital cohabitation breaking up within 5 years is 49 percent. After 10 years, the probability of a first marriage ending is 33 percent, compared with 62 percent for cohabitations.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:22 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
i wasn't referring to gay marriage. referring to straight marriage. i just don't see the point in either case, and wanna know if i'm the only one who feels you don't have to be married to be with someone for a long term relationship/have a house and a kid.
By marrying a woman it gives her the assurance that you are in it for the long haul, commitment. And not to mention how your kids would think that my dad did not even love our mom enough to marry her. Look at success in a marriage and not the failure of it. With that you can go farther. Look at the glass as half full instead of half empty
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:37 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
do you think that 2 people must get married or is it acceptable to continue dating for long periods of time? me and the gf had a major fight the other day and it sparked my curiosity on what other people thought about marriage in general.

my though is that marriage is stupid, outdated, has a 50% failure rate, and is a religious tradition that doesn't fit modern society IMO. i for one am not religious and do not believe in any god, or any higher power or whatever else people believe in these days.

what marriage to me means is a piece of paper that legally declares i'm with someone, and a ring on your finger that tells other people that your taken. you don't need paper and an expensive ring for that...
well marriage is a team effort. when selfish people get married it usually ends in divorce i have seen this happen in person more times than i care to admit. i would think it best that those people should not get married as when they split is usually affects a child unfortunately.

when you and a spouse are able to operate as a team to achieve mutal goals its a great thing. most people will say that a marriage is 50/50. while that is true, the percentage will always shift. when your wife is ill you pick up the slack. when you work late for a week she picks up the slack.

expect the occasional disagreement too. to expect that two people living in the same home aren't going to have a clash of opinion once in a while is unrealistic. it happens.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:42 PM   #15
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My wife makes fun of me and calls me names.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:51 PM   #16
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My wife makes fun of me and calls me names.
because you wear her dresses?
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:53 PM   #17
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I love my wife, and our wedding was for us and our family to celebrate our commitment to eachother. I believe in marriage and think the only reason someone would not is fear of commitment.
How long have you and the GF been together?
Maybe its Shit or get off the pot time.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:55 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kodiak450r View Post
then why do marriages have a roughly 50% success rate nowadays?
Because 50% of the time people don't fully understand what it is. The Rates are growing because, IMO, our culture is more self centered then ever before.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RyeBread View Post
http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/02..._mar_cohab.htm

in part, some text that may be pertinent to you:
In Theory They started out as just Cohabiting. I guess. But then We decieded we couldn't handle staying with one person, And we haven't been able to prove that wrong since.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ovrlnd View Post
well marriage is a team effort. when selfish people get married it usually ends in divorce i have seen this happen in person more times than i care to admit. i would think it best that those people should not get married as when they split is usually affects a child unfortunately.

when you and a spouse are able to operate as a team to achieve mutal goals its a great thing. most people will say that a marriage is 50/50. while that is true, the percentage will always shift. when your wife is ill you pick up the slack. when you work late for a week she picks up the slack.

expect the occasional disagreement too. to expect that two people living in the same home aren't going to have a clash of opinion once in a while is unrealistic. it happens.
Great way of putting it.

Marriage is about Sacrificing your Desires so that you can make your Spouses life better. In turn, they should be doing that for you. If they don't though, That's not an Excuse to not hold up your end of the deal.

Quote:
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.
John 15:13

^^ My Experience.
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Old April 4th, 2010, 08:59 PM   #19
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i was married once for eight years. it was completely the wrong move. I have two awesome kids and that is the only thing positive that came from it. she lost our house and pretty much everything else.

my g/f now i have been with for five years and we talk about getting married. But getting married is not the be all and end all. Katie is my best friend in the world and she is totally my better half. She is this married or not!

You know whether or not the women your with is the one who would rather spend more time with than anyone else. then it is time to get married. If your not there yet dont make the mistake everyone else does.

end rant :)
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Old April 4th, 2010, 09:03 PM   #20
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I feel it is fine to date someone for as long as you want, and even live with them. When you throw children in the mix I feel the two parents involved should be married. It is a commitment and should be taken very seriously, and if you feel you could live with this person forever and have children with then you should not have a problem making the decision, cause it sounds like maybe that is what the fight was about?
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