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Old November 23rd, 2008, 10:57 AM   #121
clint357
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What does WTC stand for?
What Trade Centre?

What is the New York City Fire Department's favorite song?
"It's Raining Men"
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Old November 23rd, 2008, 11:16 AM   #122
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OK, time for a contribution.

A little girl, about 5, walks in on mommy and daddy having sex. They quickly tell her to leave. The little girl asks mommy later what they were doing. Mom has a pause and states "Ah, we were making cakes." The little girl without any concerns replies "Oh, ok mommy."

A couple days later the little girl asks mommy if her and daddy were making cakes on the living room sofa. Mommy replies "Ah, yes we were. Why?" The little girl then states "I figured that because I licked all the frosting that was left over off the couch."

I may have another later . . . .
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Old November 23rd, 2008, 10:21 PM   #123
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A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
'You know what?' says the 6 year old. 'I think it's about time we started cussing. The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, 'When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass..' The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, 'Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios. ' WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, 'You can stay there until I let you out!'
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, 'And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?' I don't know, he blubbers, 'but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!'
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Old November 23rd, 2008, 11:56 PM   #124
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Originally Posted by clint357 View Post
What does WTC stand for?
What Trade Centre?

What is the New York City Fire Department's favorite song?
"It's Raining Men"
Not Funny.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 12:17 AM   #125
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JDirt View Post
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
'You know what?' says the 6 year old. 'I think it's about time we started cussing. The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, 'When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass..' The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, 'Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios. ' WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, 'You can stay there until I let you out!'
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, 'And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?' I don't know, he blubbers, 'but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!'
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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:10 AM   #126
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What is the difference between Sara Palin and Michelle Obama??

One should be in Playboy and the other...national geographic
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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:23 AM   #127
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlatFender View Post
Not Funny.

mishowjeeper says to keep your opinion to yourself

freedom of speech and what not

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You don't seem to get it. It's a joke thread. Not a "fag clint wish I was eastwood's form of humor" joke thread. I can't say I like your jokes, but I don't fukc with you about it. If you don't like somebody elses just keep your opinion to yourself. BTW, here's another one just for you.

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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:31 AM   #128
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mishowjeeper says to keep your opinion to yourself

freedom of speech and what not
Showjeeper can suck my dick.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:34 AM   #129
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Originally Posted by SBC YJ View Post
What is the difference between Sara Palin and Michelle Obama??

One should be in Playboy and the other...national geographic


Awesome
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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:40 AM   #130
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlatFender View Post
Showjeeper can suck my dick.
don't forget creeping death


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oh, did i offend you?
don't like em?
don't read em.
sorry you are so sensitive.
and again,
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Old November 24th, 2008, 01:40 AM   #131
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creeping death doesnt bother me.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:09 AM   #132
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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit.....



9 months
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Old November 24th, 2008, 08:35 AM   #133
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Originally Posted by fukkinrizzo View Post
don't forget creeping death
how could you?



Young Susan asks her dad if she can borrow the car.
DAD: "Only if you suck my cock, Susan. You know the rules..."
Susan sighs and drops to her knees. Dad whips his unit out and she plants her lips around it. Instantly she recoils in disgust.
SUSAN: "Eurrghh! It tastes like shit!"
DAD: " Yeah, your brother wanted to borrow twenty bucks..."
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You ain't got no problem, Jules. I'm on the motherfucker.

Last edited by creeping death; November 24th, 2008 at 09:06 AM.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:10 PM   #134
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heard this one earlier....

Whats the difference between sarah palins mouth and her vag.







Only one retarded thing came out of her vag
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:11 PM   #135
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What do you get when you cross a bridge, with a car?




































To the other side.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:26 PM   #136
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MAKE SURE YOU READ ALL OR WONT MAKE SENSE!



So there is three guys, silver guy, bronze guy, and gold guy.
Silver guy works at a silver factory, making silver parts, has a silver lunch. Every day after his silver job, he hops in silverado, goes on the silver highway, pulls down his silver street, pulls into his silver driveway, parks in his silver garage. Opens the silver doorhandle, goes up the silver stairs, to his silver room, where he takes off his silver socks, lies in his silver bed, fluffs his silver pillow, turns on his silver tv, and has silver dreams.
Bronze guy, on the other hand, works at a bronze factory, making bronzer tanning bottles, has a bronze lunch. Every day after his bronze bottling job, he hops in bronze benz, goes on the bronze highway, over the bronze river, pulls down his bronze street, pulls into his bronze driveway, parks in his bronze garage. Opens the bronze door lever, goes up the bronze winding stairs, to his bronze room, where he takes off his bronze slippers, lies in his bronze bed, fluffs his bronze pillow, turns on his bronze radio, and has bronze dreams.
Finally, gold guy, works at a gold earing factory, making gold hoop earings, has a gold lunch. Every day after his gold earing job, he hops in goldwig, goes on the gold highway, drives by mcdonalds gold arches, pulls down his gold street, pulls into his gold driveway, parks in his gold garage. Opens the gold door, goes up the gold elevator, to his gold room, where he takes off his gold slippers, lies in his gold bed, fluffs his gold pillow, turns on his gold radio, and has gold dreams.
One day, they are all on the phone, and they say, we should have breakfast. The only problem is that none of them like leaving there own towns. So they decided to meat in metal town at a diner for a nice little breakfast. The waitress asks the silver guy what he wants, he says "cheerios". Then the bronze guy, he sais "oatmeal. Then the gold guy "cheerios".
















The moral of the story is that 2 out of 3 people choose cheerios over oatmeal.
hahahahahaha
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:34 PM   #137
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The funny thing is u typed that whole lame ass joke.


Quote:
Originally Posted by BladeBucky View Post
MAKE SURE YOU READ ALL OR WONT MAKE SENSE!



So there is three guys, silver guy, bronze guy, and gold guy.
Silver guy works at a silver factory, making silver parts, has a silver lunch. Every day after his silver job, he hops in silverado, goes on the silver highway, pulls down his silver street, pulls into his silver driveway, parks in his silver garage. Opens the silver doorhandle, goes up the silver stairs, to his silver room, where he takes off his silver socks, lies in his silver bed, fluffs his silver pillow, turns on his silver tv, and has silver dreams.
Bronze guy, on the other hand, works at a bronze factory, making bronzer tanning bottles, has a bronze lunch. Every day after his bronze bottling job, he hops in bronze benz, goes on the bronze highway, over the bronze river, pulls down his bronze street, pulls into his bronze driveway, parks in his bronze garage. Opens the bronze door lever, goes up the bronze winding stairs, to his bronze room, where he takes off his bronze slippers, lies in his bronze bed, fluffs his bronze pillow, turns on his bronze radio, and has bronze dreams.
Finally, gold guy, works at a gold earing factory, making gold hoop earings, has a gold lunch. Every day after his gold earing job, he hops in goldwig, goes on the gold highway, drives by mcdonalds gold arches, pulls down his gold street, pulls into his gold driveway, parks in his gold garage. Opens the gold door, goes up the gold elevator, to his gold room, where he takes off his gold slippers, lies in his gold bed, fluffs his gold pillow, turns on his gold radio, and has gold dreams.
One day, they are all on the phone, and they say, we should have breakfast. The only problem is that none of them like leaving there own towns. So they decided to meat in metal town at a diner for a nice little breakfast. The waitress asks the silver guy what he wants, he says "cheerios". Then the bronze guy, he sais "oatmeal. Then the gold guy "cheerios".
















The moral of the story is that 2 out of 3 people choose cheerios over oatmeal.
hahahahahaha
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:35 PM   #138
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The funny thing is u typed that whole lame ass joke.
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Old November 24th, 2008, 02:59 PM   #139
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The funny thing is u typed that whole lame ass joke.
its worth it
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Old November 24th, 2008, 03:17 PM   #140
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The only survivors of a plane wreck were Pam Anderson and John, an average guy. They made it to an island where they found food and could make shelter. Realizing they were the only people and may never be rescued, they ended up having sex as they please. One day, a box washed up on shore, and they opened it to reveal a ballcap and a birthday card. John said, "Pam, I want you to put on this hat, walk to the far side of the island, and next time you see me answer to the name of Joe." Knowing their situation had been hard on him, she agreed. The next day, John walked around the island and found Pam. He says "Hey Joe, you won't believe this! I've been f**king Pam Anderson for the past two years!"
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