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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:29 PM   #1
scorpio_vette
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Default how do you.........

i thought the internet new everything. but apparently there seems to be alot of confusion on "HOW TO WIPE YOUR BUTT". I can find professional writeups on how to shower, how to wash your hair, how to dry yourself, how to brush your teeth, how to masturbate, how to pee standing up, etc. etc..
you know.......all the things you need to know in life.

but i can't find one single profesional writeup on how to wipe your butt. and the few basic writeups i found all disagree with each other.

so how do you wipe???

sitting down
standing up
front to back
back to front
reach between the legs
reach around back
laying on the floor with your feet in the air
call for help

how do you do it???


and while we're at it. what's your favorite toiletpaper??? i hate the commercial kind. they're so narrow and single ply. i'm always afraid that if i don't get it centered on the landing strip that i'll get it on my hands. LOL

my favorite toilet paper is quilted norther super absorbent double rolls.

but the worst kind is that super fluffy soft kind. my in-laws use that stuff and i hate it. it's so soft and then it rips and your fingers.....never mind i just hate that fluffy soft stuff.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:30 PM   #2
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I use a bidet.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:32 PM   #3
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a what???
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:32 PM   #4
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Sitting down, reach back, Front to back and back to front, up the sides like a snow boarder, then, baby wipes. Nice and clean.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:33 PM   #5
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i find the nearest cat? j/k
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:33 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by scorpio_vette View Post
a what???
Bidet
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A toilet (left) and a bidet (right).A bidet is a low-mounted plumbing fixture or type of sink intended for washing the genitalia and the anus. A French word originally, in English bidet is pronounced (IPA): [bɨˈdeɪ] (US), [ˈbiːdeɪ] (UK).

Different style
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:34 PM   #7
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In English it means a toilet that squirts water up your butt
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:35 PM   #8
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Bidet
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search

A toilet (left) and a bidet (right).A bidet is a low-mounted plumbing fixture or type of sink intended for washing the genitalia and the anus. A French word originally, in English bidet is pronounced (IPA): [bɨˈdeɪ] (US), [ˈbiːdeɪ] (UK).
I used to have one, but I had it removed because everytime Nick came over he tried drinking from it.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:36 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonkeyBiz View Post
Bidet
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search

A toilet (left) and a bidet (right).A bidet is a low-mounted plumbing fixture or type of sink intended for washing the genitalia and the anus. A French word originally, in English bidet is pronounced (IPA): [bɨˈdeɪ] (US), [ˈbiːdeɪ] (UK).
ooohhhh a bubler. we have those in germany. butt fountains.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:37 PM   #10
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why is this in the recycle bin??? this is educational :)
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:38 PM   #11
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The recycle bin. Posts deemed annoying. If you see your post here, take a hint

haha
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Old July 18th, 2007, 05:38 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlamesFearMe View Post
I used to have one, but I had it removed because everytime Nick came over he tried drinking from it.
That is funny because when I went to brazil I had never seen one before, and when we got off the plane we headed for the apartment and i had to shit so bad, so I went in there, sat down on the toilet, leaned over and drank from it.. When I came out and said that having a drinking fountain right next to the toilet was a great thing... After they started breathing again from laughing, they explained it to me.
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Old July 18th, 2007, 06:45 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by MonkeyBiz View Post
That is funny because when I went to brazil I had never seen one before, and when we got off the plane we headed for the apartment and i had to shit so bad, so I went in there, sat down on the toilet, leaned over and drank from it.. When I came out and said that having a drinking fountain right next to the toilet was a great thing... After they started breathing again from laughing, they explained it to me.
why are you drinking ANYTHING that's in the bathroom???
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