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Old May 2nd, 2013, 09:35 PM   #81
fsumotorhead
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I got shot in the face with a 12 ga.
my brother shot me in the neck with a 12ga about eight years ago, good thing it was bird shot and he was a little ways away.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 09:39 PM   #82
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my dog bit a third of my upper lip off when i was 9.


it was not a pit.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 09:39 PM   #83
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I have been to all 50 states, most of them multiple times, and 46 of them last year. I've also been to over a dozen countries. My children had been in 43 states by the time they were 5 and 8.

I have had many unique jobs, including traveling vodka salesman and underwater airplane mechanic.

I have been called too loud by my deaf girlfriend.

I speak profanity, broken english, and slang fluently.

I once had a pet squirrel.

I long hauled the 2000 and 2001 Hot Rod Magazine Power Tours and ended up in the magazine once and on TV a couple times.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 09:46 PM   #84
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I poop at least once or twice daily
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 09:47 PM   #85
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I was a professional shit shoveler once upon a time. I worked for the Oakland County Drain Commission for a summer, and spent many a hot summer day underground in the overflow basin for the 12 Town Drain while we ran a cleaning cycle that pushed all of the debris down to the big pumps. We scooped out the debris and loaded it into a dump truck.

I was living at home at the time, my mom used to make me strip down to my skivvies before coming in the house because I often had an odor that surrounded me.
i was the septic guy for about 13 years, pumped and installed systems. most days i was nekid before i came in the house at the end of the day.
the worst was pumping grease traps and the grand haven fish cleaning station in the summer.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:01 PM   #86
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I've enjoyed cocaine in the Caribbean, but never on US soil.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:24 PM   #87
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I am smarter than you.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:28 PM   #88
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I was child star with bozo the clown once
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:29 PM   #89
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I was child star with bozo the clown once
that makes two of us. bozo was a whore.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:44 PM   #90
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I owned over 200 vehicles by the time I was 30.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 10:45 PM   #91
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I was child star with bozo the clown once
Me toooo!!!!
I have a vhs tape of it lol
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:14 PM   #92
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Me toooo!!!!
I have a vhs tape of it lol
I was on the show also. Did he touch you guys in the back room also?
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:18 PM   #93
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I once partied with the Orlando magic cheerleaders, and blew out the only bathroom in the house with a days of fast food and drinking mass amounts of the cheapest beer possible Shit. Luckily I made it out of the bathroom with no one knowing it was me that dropped an A-bomb in the shitter.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:37 PM   #94
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I was on the show also. Did he touch you guys in the back room also?
it was hardly worth the extra Twinkie in that POS goodie bag.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:40 PM   #95
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i poop at least once or twice daily
x2
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:46 PM   #96
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I punched my sleeping cat in the face when I was four. My dad watched me do it, and apparently I couldn't have hit it harder. And when it woke up it blinked about 3000x in two seconds.

I had no idea why the cat hated me, because I don't remember doing it. My dad told me when I was about 12, after he had to introduce patches to the business end of the shotgun.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:50 PM   #97
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I punched my sleeping cat in the face when I was four. My dad watched me do it, and apparently I couldn't have hit it harder. And when it woke up it blinked about 3000x in two seconds.

I had no idea why the cat hated me, because I don't remember doing it. My dad told me when I was about 12, after he had to introduce patches to the business end of the shotgun.
I'm guessing it was female, bitches don't forget a damn thing.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 11:50 PM   #98
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it was hardly worth the extra Twinkie in that POS goodie bag.
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 09:39 AM   #99
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No kidding, my youngest is two years older than her...
Mine too.
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 09:48 AM   #100
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I'm guessing it was female, bitches don't forget a damn thing.
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