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Old April 23rd, 2013, 11:01 PM   #1
Nuggets
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Default Sawdust Challenge

Not too long ago, in another thread, some of our fine forum members proclaimed the magic healing powers of adding sawdust to a failing transmission. I proclaimed bullshit and was promptly told I don't know anything about ghetto transmission repair. Some even questioned my sexual orientation proclaiming I prefer the company of gentlemen. Well, now is the time take me to school. I have in my possession a 1992 Pontiac Bonneville with transmission issues. first and reverse are OK, but it slips pretty bad in the rest of the gears. The transmission fluid is black. This seems like a very good candidate for Uncle Jim-Bob's Powdered Transmission Cure All.

So now I present to you:

Nugget's Great Transmission Challenge

I challenge anybody willing to travel to my shop in Auburn to get this Boneyville transmission operational again using your favorite flavor of sawdust. I will document the proceedings on video and present said video to this site for everyone's abusement.

The rules:

1) Only sawdust can be used. Type,volume, and particle size is your choice and you have to provide your own. Nothing else can be added or drained from transmission.

2) No pleasuring yourself in the shop restroom. Jerking off in the compressor room is acceptable.

To be considered a successful repair, the car must shift through all four gears and survive a 20 mile combination city/highway drive with several stops and shut downs. The transmissions does not have to shift "like new" but well enough to fool a person that does not know the transmission needs to be replaced.

If a person is successful at meeting my challenge, I will, on video, admit their superior knowledge of incorrect ways to repair a transmission. I will then look in to the camera and say ANYTHING they want me to with the exception of peoples' mothers or fucked in the head religious groups. We will then enjoy some pizza and crafted beers (or domestic piss water if they insist) on my dime. However, should the person fail my challenge, they will be required to admit their failure and then (tongue in cheek) proclaim they are not worthy of being in the presence of my vast automotive knowledge. After that, we will enjoy some pizza and beers on their dime.

So this is the challenge I present. Should you accept, bring some friends and I'll try to get a few of mine over for some social interaction. Let's have some fun with this.
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Old April 23rd, 2013, 11:05 PM   #2
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Old April 23rd, 2013, 11:07 PM   #3
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EveryOne Knows Sawdust Is For Motors
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Old April 23rd, 2013, 11:08 PM   #4
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I am willing to ship you some shavings from the big tree that I just cut up if nobody is willing to take your challenge. You can put as much as you want in to see if it works.
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Old April 23rd, 2013, 11:57 PM   #5
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I don't think it will work but I kinda wanna pour saw dust into a trans and eat pizza. How will they car be returned to your shop if it doesn't work? I am under the understanding the cars well being is of no issue?
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Old April 24th, 2013, 06:40 AM   #6
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Way to go Nuggets... I would love to attend this scientiferific trial... Unfortunately, I live too far away...
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:00 AM   #7
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Nuggets, is your place the one with the red porsche out front? That is sweet, is it a kit or the real deal?
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:05 AM   #8
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Awful lot of trouble just to lure a man to your compressor room.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:07 AM   #9
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Awful lot of trouble just to lure a man to your compressor room.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:12 AM   #10
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Nuggets, is your place the one with the red porsche out front? That is sweet, is it a kit or the real deal?
It's worked in the past.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:13 AM   #11
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Nuggets, is your place the one with the red porsche out front? That is sweet, is it a kit or the real deal?
It's the real deal but it has been molested in the past. The owner has dropped $25K into it (not all with me) and it's still a turd.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:15 AM   #12
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That sucks, looked nice from the road. Nice shop too. You've definitely improved on the place.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:17 AM   #13
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I'll come toss some sawdust into your transmission. will you be home around 9?
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:19 AM   #14
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I'm guessing this sawdust will make the trans stop slipping until the valve body is clogged.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 07:19 AM   #15
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I hope someone takes you up on this. Still, it won't prove much to me one way or the other. A one vehicle sample size in inconclusive, especially considering how many different things could be wrong with any number of different transmission models. Am I convinced saw dust will fix a trans? No. But I do believe that it has potential to help some work temporarily in some cases. Also note that the person claiming they had personal experience with this working short term did so with new fluid(another variable). It's entirely possible that just a fluid change would make the trans in question work properly....also possible that it'd never work again. Like I said, too many variables to learn anything conclusive. Should be entertaining though! I'd take part(ie, drink beer, eat, pizza, and jerk off on your desk) if I were closer.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 08:17 AM   #16
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When I saw the title "Sawdust Challenge" I thought it was going to be a new, more idiotic take on the Cinnamon Challenge.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 08:22 AM   #17
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When I saw the title "Sawdust Challenge" I thought it was going to be a new, more idiotic take on the Cinnamon Challenge.
Try that and video it for us.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 08:46 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bbaXJ View Post
I hope someone takes you up on this. Still, it won't prove much to me one way or the other. A one vehicle sample size in inconclusive, especially considering how many different things could be wrong with any number of different transmission models. Am I convinced saw dust will fix a trans? No. But I do believe that it has potential to help some work temporarily in some cases. Also note that the person claiming they had personal experience with this working short term did so with new fluid(another variable). It's entirely possible that just a fluid change would make the trans in question work properly....also possible that it'd never work again. Like I said, too many variables to learn anything conclusive. Should be entertaining though! I'd take part(ie, drink beer, eat, pizza, and jerk off on your desk) if I were closer.
True, this is not a complete method of determining if the procedure works but I only have one car available and I like beer.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 10:11 AM   #19
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I might have to come watch this. And stick on your desk.
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Old April 24th, 2013, 10:29 AM   #20
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Pine tree dust with sap mixed in works the most best
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