Stop your whining, put the junk in the garage, get rid of the dumpster, maybe get a compactor, and get a normal trash service.
Your neighbors probably don't want to smell all that dingy, wet, maggot ridden trash.
As for the tractor park it at a truck stop and have your wife/other pick you up (like most respectable drivers do). Yes your talking like a hour in your case. But it is your fault for your bad planning.
Tell your employer you need to get back to Michigan to get this settled. They are obligated to let you do so. Don't be put OOS because of this bs.
Your making drivers look bad with your "screw you all I don't wanna" approach. Just fix it and move on.